A New Chapter

Life really does play out in chapters….


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How Many Can You Take


Take the Quiz yourself and find out how many Biebers you can take down!!!

Restore some of my faith in humanity and take the test!!

Take The Quiz

How many Justin Biebers could you take in a fight?

Created by Oatmeal

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A modern kids exchange with Santa…


Dear Santa,

How are you? How is Mrs. Claus? I hope everyone, from the reindeer to the elves, is fine. I have been a very good boy this year. I would like an X-Box 360 with Call of Duty IV and an iPhone 4 for Christmas. I hope you remember that come Christmas Day.

Merry Christmas,

Timmy Jones

* *

Dear Timmy,

Thank you for you letter. Mrs. Claus, the reindeer and the elves are all fine and thank you for asking about them. Santa is a little worried all the
time you spend playing video games and texting. Santa wouldn’t want you to get fat. Since you have indeed been a good boy, I think I’ll bring you
something you can go outside and play with.

Merry Christmas,

Santa

* *

Mr. Claus,

Seeing that I have fulfilled the “naughty vs. Nice” contract, set by you I might add, I feel confident that you can see your way clear to granting me what I have asked for. I certainly wouldn’t want to turn this joyous season into one of litigation. Also, don’t you think that a jibe at my weight coming from an overweight man who goes out once a year is a bit trite?

Respectfully,

Tim Jones
* *

Mr. Jones,

While I have acknowledged you have met the “nice” criteria, need I remind you that your Christmas list is a request and in no way is it
a guarantee of services provided. Should you wish to pursue legal action, well that is your right. Please know, however, that my attorney’s have been
on retainer ever since the Burgermeister Meisterburger incident and will be more than happy to take you on in open court. Additionally, the exercise I
alluded to will not only improve your health, but also improve your social skills and potentially help clear up a complexion that looks like the bottom of the Burger King fry bin most days.

Very Truly Yours,

S Claus

* *

Now look here Fat Man,

I told you what I want and I expect you to bring it. I was attempting to be polite about this but you brought my looks and my friends into this. Now you just be disrespecting me. I’m about to tweet my boys and we’re gonna be waiting for your fat @ss and I’m taking my game console, my game, my phone, and whatever else I want. WHAT EVER I WANT, MAN!

T-Bone
* *

Listen Pizza Face,

Seriously??? You think a dude that breaks into every house in the world on one night and never gets caught sweats a skinny G-banger wannabe? “He sees
you when you’re sleeping; He knows when you’re awake”. Sound familiar, genius? You know what kind of resources I have at my disposal. I got your
sh*t wired, Jack. I go all around the world and see ways to hurt people that if I described them right now, you’d throw up your Totino’s pizza roll
all over the carpet of your mom’s basement. You’re not getting what you asked for, but I’m still stopping by your crib to stomp a mud hole in
your @ss and then walk it dry. Chew on that, Petunia.

S Clizzy

* *

Dear Santa,

Bring me whatever you see fit. I’ll appreciate anything.

Timmy
* *

Timmy,

That’s what I thought you little b@st@rd.

Santa

 

Grumpy-Cat-Humbug


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Thanks South Park ….


 

 

 

Thanks Honey Boo Boo for taking TV to a whole new low. It just goes to show you that it doesn’t matter who you are, where you come from, or what you look like… anyone can make it on to TV now-a-days.

South Park hit the nail on the head with this one they always over exaggerate their skits to make the ridiculously hilarious but they really didn’t have to use much imagination the comedy was already there

Thanks South Park for helping us to realize that we have reached an all time low.

Places to watch the episode. 🙂 Enjoy

South Park – Raising the Bar (South Park Studio’s)

YouTube Part 1 

YouTube Part 2 

 


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New Haircut


New haircuts are always fun but we either end up with something we totally love or something that we totally hate. I haven’t been ballsy enough to cut drastic amounts of hair off nor have I been daring enough to die my hair in the fear that if I do it I will never get my original hair color back. Which is an irrational and childish thought since I know it will grow back.

Well last night my mother in law and I were talking and I mentioned to her that when she cut her daughters bangs they came out really good and I was thinking about doing bangs but I was a little iffy since I have naturally curly hair and I didn’t want them to get scrunched up and stuck in a weird position. While I was explaining all this to her she is gathering up the tools needed to just chop my hair off right where I was sitting!!

I let her and they came out good I like them, and they didn’t scrunch up and leave me with little inch long curled up bangs either. But I haven’t had bangs in a long time… around 10 years. Also I am used to being one of the people who tend to run their fingers though their hair all the time so this is a whole new sensation I have to get used to now having hair in my face but it is supposed to be there and I can’t really run my fingers though my hair or else it just throws the bangs all to hell.

One thing I noticed is that no matter how hard you try to reassure yourself you are convinced that your bangs look something like this all day long….


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I’m So Ronery …


My first morning getting ready without my hubby was so lonely, I had been getting ready in my bathroom while he slept for almost a year but at least he was still right there to snuggle me while I slept, and for me to hug and kiss before I left the house.

This morning I had to get ready alone because he recently started working the night shift and he goes to work when it is time for me to go to sleep, he is sleeping when I get home from work because he has to get up at 8:00pm and I am sleeping when it is time for him to get up and get ready.

Our schedule barley fits any time for us to just hang out like we used to ….. that’s why I thought this song was perfect for the occasion……

………I am so ronery now …..

 


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Funniest Ride Ever …


……….Me and my boyfriend are Perfect for each other ………

……The BEST car ride of my life ……

Trying to stuff a 20 piece chicken McNugget in our face on that way home from McDonald’s because we didn’t buy everyone enough!!!

God I wish I had YouTubed that moment !!!


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Inspirational Songs To Help Get Through The Day


Everyone needs a little pick me up every once in a while. I may not like all of these artist songs but these ones had lyrics that i think just about anyone could relate to, so whether you into rock, rap, or pop, this list has something inspirational for you. 😉

Rap/ R&B 

Gym Class Heroes: The Fighter ft. Ryan Tedder

(As stated best in the first comment “….the definition of motivational music”


Bruno Mars – Just The Way You Are

Travie McCoy: Billionaire ft. Bruno Mars

Pop 

Pink –F*cking Perfect

Katy Perry – Firework

Lady Gaga – Born That Way

Mariah Carey – Hero

LMAFO – Sexy and I Know It

Demi Lovato – Skyscraper

Rock/ Alternative 

Rise Against – Make it Stop (September Children)

Rise Against – Satellite

 


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Forget Road Rage… I Have Computer Rage!!


There are very few if any keys on a keyboard that are completely useless, but I have grown to absolutely hate the Num Lock button. Now most of you are thinking, “why I hardly use that button?” Well I will tell you this weather you use it a lot or only once or twice, I bet the only time you push it is out of anger.

Let me explain…. The num pad obviously has numbers and that the most likely function you are going to use it for. And since you see Numbers written largely and the words and arrows on the keys are small your brain automatically assumes that when you push those buttons numbers will appear on the screen. So then why in god name does the keyboard default to having the num lock turned off, as if we use 7 and 1 for “home” and “end” all the flippin time, when there is  a home and end button dedicated to just that function closer then the 7 and the 1.

Maybe this is just something personal with me and my keyboard and no one else goes through this problem, and most of you don’t even understand what I am saying. But haven’t you been in the situation where all you want to do is use the number key pad to make entering numbers faster and by force of habit you just start typing and your flippin screen starts going up and down page up, page down…. You freak out and bang on the num lock pad and look at your key board like it should have known better.